Ruin a wish

Granted, but you get attacked by the KRAKEN! (I love that thing....)

I wish I could play Wind Waker right now.

Granted, but it connects to all of your other Zelda data, crashes, and erases all of it.

I wish I knew everything.

Granted but your brain explodes because of data overload.

That reminds me of Indiana Jones and the cyrstal skull

I wish I owned French Polynesia.

Granted, but in Soviet Russia, French Polynesia owns you.

I wish I could drink another Pepsi and not regret it

granted but, a group of starving (and thirsty) children appear and demand the pepsi.

I wish that I could change size at will.

Granted but you shrink to a very small size and get eaten by ladybugs.
I wish global warming didn't exist.

granted but without global warming, the earth's tempature falls to -300 degrees

I wish I had a pet dragon.

Granted, but it destroys everything that you care about.

I wish I had telekinesis.

Granted but you can't control it so you mess everything up.

I wish I had unlimited mints.

Granted but your tastebuds get used to the flavor and they stop being good.

I wish Merce Cunningham was still alive

Granted, but he makes everyone dance until they die.

I wish I had more food in my fridge.

Granted, but it was all SPAM

I wish I could free dive.

((I actually kinda like spam...))
Granted but you drown.

I wish I could punch everyone I hate in the face, just for one day.

granted but, the next day you are arrested

I wish I could sing higher than a human can hear.
(bass, tenor, alto, soprano, sopranimisimo... oh yes, it should be real)

Granted but it makes dogs angry at you.

I wish that I could live in the u.k.

Granted but the French take over U.K

I wish I had a pie.

Granted but you eat a ton of pie and get really chubby. (like a bunny.)

I wish that I had a thestral. (like in HP)

I don't think anyone knows what that is so no one is posting.
I want to start this back up so

I wish could see ultra-violet.

(It's like purple, except better)

Granted, but because Ultra-violet is damaging, your eyes sizzle out like melted marshmallows. *evil laugh*

I wish I could play Starfox instead of pretending to do homework

Granted but you play until you keel over and die.

I wish August would hurry up and get here. (as in the month.)

Granted but the world starves because there was no harvest

I wish that I had the Final Fantasy xiii soundtrack.

Granted but the volume becomes so high that it makes you deaf.

I wish that the alcove existed (I don't feel like explaining it but It's kinda like a diminesional portal.)

Granted but you don't survive going through it

I wish I was a ranger. (Like in Ranger's Apprentice)

Granted but you take an arrow to the knee so you can't do anything anymore. (I don't know.)

I wish I could trip people with my mind.

(Dear Cameron, A Thestral is one of the weird skeleton things with wings in Harry Potter.)

(Dear Grace, my name is spelled Camron. Just saying)

Granted but you accidently trip yourself.

I wish I could do magic.